Excuse the two-day delay since I have last posted, but it has taken this long to recover from a six-hour wait in the blasting sun outside an Apple store in Walnut Creek, Calif. It was my latest unsuccessful attempt for an iPhone. To be fair, my choosiness accounts for part of the reason I do not have one. I want the black 16GB model, and nothing else will do. I turned down an 8GB a week ago, and as you will see, turned down a white model Thursday. Below is the account of my latest (and last) misadventure as a victim of the Steve Jobs Media Hype Machine.

6:25 a.m. – Begin the drive to Walnut Creek. Why this particular store? The Apple retail site lists this as one of few California stores that actually has both the black and white 16 GB models. This satisfies the iPhone desires for both myself and my friend John, who is making the journey with me.

6:31 a.m. – Starbucks stop number one. Most of these people who are in here are probably going to work – which makes me feel odd about the fact I’m about to drive three hours to buy a phone. Especially since on a typical summer day I would still be asleep and have plenty of hours to go.

7:04 a.m. – Interstate 5, which had been moving quite well, is now down to one lane thanks to some road construction. A Caltrans employee is walking in the middle of the two lanes and pasting and stomping down those temporary plastic lane dividers. And to think all these years I thought some fancy iRobot-type machine performed this task.

8:48 a.m. – Arrive in Walnut Creek. John and I both do a double take when passing the Apple store when we see about 50 customers outside waiting in line. So much for the idea that getting to the store over an hour early would make this a quick operation.

8:55 a.m. – Join the line, which has reached the end of the block. The sidewalk has only about three trees in between here and the store entrance. So it looks like we’ll be in the sun the entire time. Fantastic.

9:02 a.m. – An Apple employee makes his way through the line, tallying the number of customers and announcing only white iPhones are stock (contrary to what the web site said the previous night). John and I decide we’ll wait it out through the line to get his white model, then try to hit another store to chase down a black.

9:46 a.m. – We have barely moved, even though we see customers occasionally leave the store with bags. This is clearly going to be a while. If I had an iPhone, I would have something to do while waiting in line to buy one.

10:46 a.m. – In one hour, only ten people have been helped in line. In the meantime we have struck up a conversation with two guys in front of us who are equally thrilled about our shared suffering.

11:02 a.m. – I make the first of several trips into the Apple store to find out what is taking so long. It turns out there is no more than three employees at any one time activating phones. The rest are doing their usual Apple employee gig: walking around in flip flops, trying to look cool, and praising all the Apple gadgets.

11:32 a.m. – Some employees from the California Pizza Kitchen across the street are passing out menus to everyone in line. They announce they’ll even deliver to us. Should be easy, since we’re hardly moving.

11:35 a.m. – Make a round of calls to local Apple stores. Some of them have iPhones, even though the Apple web site said otherwise last night. Thanks, Apple, for keeping your web site accurate.

11:44 a.m. – I take the first of several breaks inside the air conditioned Barnes & Noble that we’re standing in front of. (It will be hours before we move the 15 feet to be in front of the Pottery Barn Kids.)

11:52 a.m. – The first of several water rations we are given by the Apple employees. (The flavored water is kind of tasty).

1:31 pm.  – Michael, standing in front of us, makes the first of several calls to his family describing his plight. He is concerned he will be unable to pick up his son from school. Maybe he can get Steve Jobs to do it since he was unwilling to train Apple employees in how to activate phones in under an hour.

2:00 p.m. – Call more stores. The iPhones are going fast.

2:04 p.m. – Now Michael must call his son again, to inform him he is still in line. None of us imagined when we arrived here five hours earlier we’d still be here.

2:18 p.m. – An Apple employee tells the lines to move away from the buildings, because the store tenants will be upset. He wants the line far enough from the building to put all the people back in the sun. I rebel, staking my claim in the shade. So much for Apple Care.

2:38 p.m. – Ten people to go in front of us. Only one more hour.

3:38 p.m. – So much for projection.

4:02 p.m. – We’re in. It’s like gaining entrance to the Valhalla. Next a twenty-something Apple girl takes us through the activation process, which includes no knowledge of the various AT&T programs except for the basic plans. We are told that to get more detailed information, we must go to AT&T after activating the phones here.  John gets his white 16GB and we leave the store.  Fortunately because I’m holding out for a black 16GB,  I waited in line for seven hours not to get one, so botched activation doesn’t really matter right now.

4:18 pm. – Head to dinner across the street at CPK for nourishment and to recover from heat exhaustion before heading into traffic for the 3 1/2 hour drive home.  Somewhere out there is a shiny black iPhone with my name on it.